I love k**s.Dwayne: I had never participated in a date auction before. I only agreed because it was for a good cause—the proceeds were going to breast cancer research.Abigail: The auction was held at a live-music venue in downtown Austin. When Dwayne came onstage, five other women raised their paddles and started bidding on him, too. My eldest sister, Amanda, 34, can be a little competitive. (Plus, she had had a few drinks.) She was determined to win Dwayne for me at all costs. And she did—for $600.Dwayne: The lights were so bright onstage, I couldn’t see who was bidding. After it was over, the organizers had me walk through the audience and hand Abby a rose. I thought, What is this beautiful girl doing buying a date?Abigail: I explained that my sisters had forced me into this and that he didn’t really have to take me out, but Dwayne insisted.Dwayne: Five days later, we ate dinner at a Mexican restaurant. We got the world’s fastest waiter, who had us in and out in 45 minutes—it was. I managed to flag down a store manager of all people and asked him where I could find a mop bucket. I was NOT very politely informed they do not stock mop buckets."But you have mops" We don't stock mop buckets"Just then I spotted a stack of buckets a couple of aisles over in a corner of the highest shelf."What are those?" Buckets" You might sell more if they were by the mops" They are not MOP buckets" Do you mind if I buy one to use for a mop bucket?"He said as he walked away, "I don't care what you use it for."This one is compliments of mikeHi, don't know where this one came from if it's already been featured here ignore it.After their 11th child, an Alabama couple decided that was enough, as they could not afford a larger bed.So the husband went to his veterinarian and told him that he and his cousin didn't want to have any more kids.The doctor told him that there was a procedure called a vasectomy that could fix the problem but that it was expensive.'A less costly alternative, '.
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